ALL FALL DOWN

Life is funny, one moment you're concerned about getting your shirts ironed for a family picture... and the next... whether or not you'll be adopting 9 year old twin girls from the Congo. God is funny, he has put it on my heart to pray for twins for the last few months... and then this prospect, not exactly what I had "created" for my own life, but His ways are so far beyond my ways, and His thoughts beyond mine. Thank goodness, or I would never be John Paul's mama. I fall on my knees to honor and praise The Creator of my family, and I endeavor to give over, sometimes every minute, my desire to control how my family will be created. He has given me nothing but good, and through every ache he has brought about inexpressible beauty. He truly makes all things new. I have ALMOST come to the point of welcoming the suffering in my life because of His faithfulness in making it all new.

Time is also funny, I sit in my worry... over what will be, and how it will all turn out. Yet all I have to do is trust the one who made me a mama in the first place. In this picture from almost 2 years ago, I didn't know if I would get to be John Paul's mama... and yet here I am... John Paul's mama. I trusted then, and He was faithful (in fact He would have been no matter what the outcome) and I need to trust now. I laugh at myself, because trusting in God's goodness should be a no brainer for me... and yet, I fall down. Yet, He faithfully picks me up, if only to say, "remember who I am, and who you are, I am your Father and you are my beloved daughter... whom I purchased with my only son's blood. I am love... and you are loved!" What else do I need to know? Nothing!